I fortunately posses many books on the Islamic Faith. One of my most favorites is one, originally gifted to me by a Saudi Driver. I gifted it to a hypocrite, not knowing he was one at the time. However, on a visit to the KL Dakwah Corner Bookstore I was able to replace it. Alhamduillah. The book, by Muhammed Al-Ghazali, Muslim Character. The author has written has published over sixty books. This book is so readable, so comprehensive. It is truly a gift. Chapter Twelve is entitled Keep Your Bosom Free of Rancor and Enmity.
Perhaps we should begin by defining rancor. It is bitterness or resentfulness, especially when long-standing. One of its synonyms is enmity, others are bitterness, animosity, antipathy, dissension, discord, acrimony, loathing, abhorrence, malice, malevolence.
The chapter begins with a Footnote Recognition of Greatness then; A Muslim’s bosom should be free from the disturbances of jealous and ill-feelings for others… The corruption of the heart from rancor and jealous is a fatal disease, from such a heart faith disappears immediately, like the liquid that flows down from the whole in its container.
Well oops, I was not free of rancor, abhorrence, malice and malevolence. It was directed toward the faces found on the Hall of Shame revealed in my April 17 and April 20th blog.
Ridding myself of rancor, but posting those photos as been a long process, I shall take you through some of the steps
At first I began to question why I allowed the scumbags, the hypocrites and the scumbaggies (the women) into my life in the first place. It seemed like a baptism of fire. I am (sometimes unfortunately) kind-hearted. I am always honest, expect others to be and new to the faith thought that if one was a Muslim you were automatically a good person. Nope – as is said: Islam is perfect; Muslims are not. Spoke to Gemini about this.
Gemini: In any faith, including Islam, there is a distinct difference between those who follow the rituals and those who embody the ethics. The ideal versus the reality goes like thisl: Most religions emphasize Ihsan (excellence in character) and Sidq (truthfulness/sincerity).However, : Some people use faith as a shield or a costume to gain trust while hiding “creep” behavior. It felt like a baptism by fire because of your vulnerability. As someone new to the faith, you likely approached it with an open heart. Hypocrites find open hearts much easier to target than closed ones. Then there is the moral shock : When you are naturally honest, you assume others operate on the same frequency. Finding out they don’t is a “burn” that changes how you navigate the world.
How to get rid of the rancor in my heart became the million dollar question. By the way million dollar question is, of course, an idiom meaning; the most difficult, most important, and most rewarding problem to solve.
Sitting on my book shelf was another book. It was Aliyah Umm Raiyann’s Living With the Quran. The two books dovetailed, creating a solution. Dovetailing means: Two different ideas or sources fitting together perfectly. Creating a seamless transition from one topic to another.Two things complementing each other to create a stronger “whole.”
Living Light is Week 3 of Living with the Quran. “Truly in the body there is a piece of flesh which, if it s sound, the whole body is sound; and if it is corrupt, the whole body is corrupt. Truly it is the heart”
The author continues; Before you pack, you need to empty your heart of anything that is no longer needed. Create space for what will truly move you forward with the Book of Allah. This reacquires yo to be completely honest. You may need to remove grudges, envy, bitterness, arrogance and something else. You need to release the belief you are not enough to live life with the Quran,
Three steps are given to live with the verses. First step is to list all the limitations and impediments and then shredder burn the pieces of paper.
My anger at these evil people is taking up too much space in my mind and leaving me full of rancor. Their photos are not only on my computer but on the computer of maybe thousands of people. I can not possible shred or burn their photos So I had to come up with an alternative.
I look at the scumbags and hypocrites as defecation – you know that word? It is the the discharge of feces from the body. When one flushes the toilet you do not follow the turds down the pipes to their eventual destination. You think of them no further, just looking at the clean toilet bowel. So now when I defecate I name the turds – like Hammad, or Mohan. I flush and think of them no more. It is working and it is rather fun. Hahaha “Flushing” them might be a funny image, but it’s a valid act of spiritual hygiene!
I now live in a hypocrite-free zone. This is my motto: “My time is for the Truthful, my silence is for the Divine, and my absence is for the Hypocrites.”
This is my final verdict. For a long time, I thought the battle was about confronting the shadows, but I’ve learned that the greatest victory is simply walking into the light. The “Hall of Shame” isn’t a place I live anymore; it’s just a museum I visited. I’m closing the gallery doors and handing the keys back to the universe. There is a profound, rhythmic peace in deciding that my energy—my “Charismatic Alexis” sparkle—is a limited resource, and it is no longer available for those who wear masks. By stepping to the sidelines, I haven’t “lost” the fight; I’ve graduated from it. The Idiom: “Throw away the key”
But I am not just leaving a room; I am deleting the room from the floor plan! By “throwing away the key,” I am telling my brain that the “hypocrites” and scumbags no longer have a way back into my headspace. It’s the ultimate “The End.” As I move into Sufism it is a perfect analogy – I am not just leaving a room, I am deleting the room from the floor plan. It is a mystical approach. Those hypocrites are not just horrible guests —they were part of a structure that no exists.
Would you not know? Rumi has the perfect wisdom: “Be like the sun for grace and mercy. Be like the night to cover others’ faults. Be like running water for generosity. Be like death for rage and anger. Be like the Earth for humility. Appear as you are. Be as you appear.” — Rumi
My task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within me that I have built in defense and smash them.
Hypocrite and Scumbags Gone and Not Returning
Well!!! I’d just finished flushing the hypocrites, and then, out of a clear blue sky, something happened that was beyond my wildest dreams.” Well finding myself again awash in idioms I asked Gemini for some assistance.
Gemini: Out of a Clear Blue Sky This idiom is all about unpredictability.Its origin: It is a variation of “a bolt from the blue.” It refers to a literal lightning bolt hitting the ground when there aren’t even any clouds in sight It describes an event that happens without any warning or “storm clouds” on the horizon. In your story, it emphasizes that you didn’t see this coming while you were busy dealing with the “trash.” Its vibe is sudden, shocking, and transformative.
Then beyond my wildest dreams is all about surprising expectations. Its origins. This phrase has been used in English literature for centuries (appearing in various forms since the 1700s) to describe a reality that exceeds even the most creative or ambitious imagination. It implies that even if you had sat down and tried to imagine the best possible thing that could happen to you, you still wouldn’t have come close to the reality.
I received a text from Melissa from Marketing. She works for Chef Ton at his new restaurant – As I Am. By the way, Chef she said she has not had a day off in three months. That is against the law – even Malaysia law. I represented Human Resources in the County of Marin. I offered to represent her for free. She changed the subject.
Anyway she asked me for my address as she said she was sending me a small token. Hmmmm – I gave it to her. The security here is superb so I was not afraid. I asked;
Me: Is it Chef Ton himself in a really big box. Hahaha Maybe a crate so he can breathe Haha.
Almost immediately it seemed my phone rang and I went to collect my ‘small token” Well, it was not the Chef, nope. It was this gorgeous box with flowers and fruit. You shall see photos of it and me – in all my gratitude.
What was this for I wonder?? Decided it was an apology from Chef Ton because he was not there for my last two visits to his new restaurant. He always would come and see me in Penang’s Sood. I hope he is there for my third visit. Or maybe not – wait to you see the gift?? And maybe he will be most apologetic therefore sending me a bigger gift for his no show. I guess we will see.
My Message to Chef Ton. “Third time’s the charm, Chef! I’m arriving with high expectations. I will either see you or get a bigger and better apology gift. I have nothing to lose. Hahaha
Photos to follow. The gift and I are rather spectacular do you not think??? If you do not think so – do you want my address so YOU can send a gift? Hahaha
