It’s High Time for a Worldly Earthly Humorous Blog With a Little Covid Thrown in For Good Measure; Enticing Defined and Illustrated: Catching Up Offering  Excuses for Abandoned Intentions; Humor Bound to Offend from The New Yorker; Cartoons, Photo of a Ghostly Sun 

How is that for a title?? Sort of grabs you, entices, seduces you to read more, perhaps?? I do love the word entice, and actually, in the past, enjoyed being enticed. 

Entice is to attract or tempt by offering pleasure or advantage. Some synonyms are most inviting: tempt, allure, lure, attract, dangle a carrot in front of; appeal to, invite, persuade,, inveigle,  beguile,, wheedle, coax, woo; seduce, lead astray, lead on, smooth-talk.

My favorites have to be dangle a carrot in front of, beguile, woo and lead astray.

I will further inveigle and lure you into reading by speaking of the most boring topic – covid. 

My very favorite scientist, the brilliant physician Dhruv Khullar. His Moving On was found in the May 15, 2023 magazine edition of New Yorker. The topic; ending Covid-19 provisions. This, of course, applies to the United States, as those folks think that they are the only nation on earth. I will NEVER know what is happening in Canada by reading my trusted New Yorker.  I have relied upon Dr. Khullar for most of my coverage  on covid. Type covid into the search engine and you come up with 169 entries. One would say that I got that topic covered. ( An informal idiom meaning that I have done, gotten, or provided whatever is needed. I took care of everything covid. Dr. Khullar begins:  

The covid-19 Public Health Emergency, which has been maintained for more than three years, across two Presidential Administrations, will lapse on May 11th, bringing a symbolic and a regulatory end to a crisis that has claimed more than 1.1 million lives in the United States and disrupted nearly every aspect of American society……The messages clear: it’s time to move on from the plague years.

He discusses the limitations of binary terminology, either we are in an acute  state of emergency—a pandemic—or we have entered a long-awaited, tractable endemic phase. 

“But, of course, an endemic pathogen can be all kinds of bad. Tuberculosis has infected humans since at least the Stone Age and is the thirteenth leading cause of death in the world, killing a million and a half people a year. covid seems to have settled into its own punishing form of endemicity. Even without a major surge this past winter, it has killed some forty thousand people in this country so far in 2023 and is on track to have taken tens of thousands more lives by the end of it. Last week, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention announced that covid was the fourth leading cause of death in the U.S. in 2022. This year, it will likely remain a top-ten killer. But, because the toll is concentrated among older and medically vulnerable people, it quickly recedes from the public consciousness.” 

Dr. Khullar discusses the practical ramifications which accompany the end of the Public Health Emergency. Those not relevant to my life, unless and until I return to the USA, which is NOT about to happen. Khullar ends somewhat optimistically: 

We often view the pandemic’s turmoil as a failure of American governance and society. We couldn’t agree on masks, vaccines, social distancing, school closures, abstract goals, or concrete facts. These failures cost lives and livelihoods. Flip the lens, however, and another reality comes into focus: this was also a time when many people had access to food, shelter, and medical care with a consistency they’d never had before. After three years of covid life, it’s natural to welcome a return to normal. But, for many, normal is a precarious place.” 

Somewhat, not terribly, optimistically because he is talking about the US – the place with no safety net, where for the majority of residents, normal is a precarious place. 

You: Where is the humor, Alexis??? Or at least excuses for abandoned aims promised on this blog. 

Me: Okay, okay, okay. Here it comes. 

I promised to become actively involved in the Alberta Election, occurring on May 29, 2023 (also my  80th birthday). I applied to be an election worker, but did not hear anything. I found out why during a casual conversation with an interesting woman in the loo of my tax accountant. 

Me: I applied but never heard a word. 

She: it is because they had 800 applicants for 100 positions. I served in a prior year, so was selected by I am working here now. 

Me: Do you like your job? Are you a university graduate? 

She: Yes! 

Me: That is fantastic! Work on! I did. Now I have remunerative retirement income, too much so actually. I am here today to see what I can do to lower my tax bill. 

She: Are you being successful? 

Me: No unfortunately. Not only that just found out I have to pay quarterlies. I am nothing but an ATM for US and Canada tax authorities. 

She: (laughingly) The price of success!! 

Me: Apparently. It does beat being a failure though. 

Also saw myself playing a major role in the attempt to defeat Premier Danielle Smith. Please note I have abandoned that project as well, for several reasons which will now be enumerated. 

  1. It is highly unlikely that anyone reading this blog is going to be voting for her in the first place. 
  2. She is doing an excellent job of ‘doing herself in’. She is constantly saying the wrong thing, lying, getting caught, chastised by the ethics committee, consorting with rogues, not learning from her countless and continuing mistakes. (When someone does themselves in they cause oneself to fail.
  3. Another factor leading to my lack of involvement is this. If worse comes to worse and she prevails – she has a history of never doing what she says she is going to do. Her success rate is almost nil. Nil means nonexistent. Some synonyms are searing: zero, 0; zilch, nix, not a dicky bird., not a sausage; zip, nada, a goose egg; , sod all. 
  4. The office of my NDP Edmonton Center MLA is closed, not open during the May 1-May 29 election season. It seems a little short-sighted but it is not possible for me to discuss strategy and share some secrets which must be told in private. 
  5. I could make a contribution to the NDP campaign and a portion is tax deductible but only in Canada, not in the US (for obvious reasons) 

As you can see I tried. I am not.a quitter but, on the other hand, it is a waste of my energy and time. 

You: Alexis, where is the promised humor?

Me: This is certain to offend almost everyone, The source is the reliable New Yorker. The title is Things People Think My Girlfriend and I Are Before Realizing We Are Lesbians. I have chosen a few and will give you the link so you can explore on your own. 

1)Europeans air-kissing but on the mouth.2) Two people having a very slow arm-wrestling competition. 3) Out-of-uniform police partners.4) Girl Bert and Ernie.5) Jehovah’s Witnesses who are lost 6) Two-sixteenths of an a-cappella group.7) Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.8) Drunk women in a bathroom who aren’t drunk or in a bathroom. 9) Reunited triplets, but one of them died 10) Synchronized swimmers. 11).Two people in the front and back of a horse costume who lost the horse costume years ago.12) Seagulls fighting over a French fry.

My favorite? It is very hard to choose but 11, followed by 8 and 9. Here is the link.

Back to serious for a couple of sentences and then back to funny, I promised someone, somewhere, and somehow, that I would stop blogging every day instead blogging every second or third day. I have been doing a good job – look at the dates. However, there is too much going on in my life – you are losing out on a lot of interesting details. So it is back to daily – for awhile anyway. Quit complaining, no one is forcing you to read this stuff. 

The remaining humor shall consist of New Yorker cartoons. Occasionally cartoons are accompanied by explanations of their relevance to me life, not this time. You will be amused, or not amused. It is entirely up to you. 

A photograph is attached, taken yesterday early evening. The sun suddenly made its appearance through the grey smoke. It was almost ghostly, supernatural. It disappeared after an hour – only the grey remained. Sunset made no impact upon the greenness and heavy fog like conditions. This morning seems brighter, visibility improved. Rain is possibly (30%) predicted for this afternoon and evening.