Recent news from CPI identifies the quote of yesterday’s blog:
She: “Kiss the moon …” quote is from a play, appropriately Kiss the Moon, Kiss the Sun, by Norm Foster, a rather minor but very prolific Canadian. I don’t know if it is original to the play – it just seemed so right,
Knee better?
Me: I went to leave the restaurant of his hotel last night – found I could not walk but was taken to my room in a wheel chair. The knee is not getting any better but at least no pain at night or when I do not walk. We will see how that goes. I figured the Sultan out – I am ok. It will take some adjusting.
CPI also send a picture of the Prime Minister of Canada, Justin Trudeau – Mr. Black face/Brown Face. Canadians re-elected him despite all of this even though such behaviour has brought down many an American politician. It is one reason I have no respect for Canadians. Neither CPI nor Alexis McBride are fond of the Prime Minister.
CPI: You have to admit, it is a fine portrait of him.
Me: I do admit it but an excellent portrait of him.
CPI: It is an excellent ;portrait and eerily and strangely and profoundly – he looks like the Sultan.It is so funny, Trudeau is so superficial. Trying to cover himself up and emulating the Crown Prince of Dubai. I would LOVE to see the two of them together …….and may, Hahahahah
CPI is my oldest friend, in every sense. She gives me so much support. My other friends do not seem to understand me these days and shy away from me. Not CPI, how much I appreciate and love her. It is lonely at the top. Of course, I had to Google that phrase, I did so and this is what was discovered.
“Power is coveted, sought, and tightly held onto. From the animal kingdom to all human societies, power is the currency of success.
However, the very nature of power and its psychological effects often leave the powerful feeling lonely at the top.
We list five ways in which power perverts, contorts and undermines a number of psychological processes that normally nurture close connections and form the foundation of healthy relationships.
1. Power alters our beliefs about others’ generosity. When people do nice things for us, we automatically devise an explanation for their behavior: Why did they go out of their way to help me? What is their motivation?
Often this process is so quick and automatic that we don’t even realize we are doing it, but despite its subtlety, it has dramatic implications for how our relationships develop and how close or connected to others we remain.
Typically, our theories for why people do nice things for us reflect well on the giver and portend good things for the relationship. We often think: “Because this person really likes and cares about me. Because this is a kind and trustworthy person.” Thus, we often see others through a beneficent lens.
However, one’s own power represents a compelling alternative explanation for what appears to be another person’s generosity.
When individuals have power, they know they are more likely to be the target of opportunists, who use kind words and seemingly selfless acts not for altruistic reasons but to further their own selfish goals.
It is this alternative explanation that always exists for the powerful and leads them to become more suspicious of others’ seemingly generous acts.
Of course this jaundiced view of other’s intentions can be functional–who wants to develop a relationship with a selfish sycophant?–but those in power often over-apply this principle and become more suspicious of any kind acts they are offered, irrespective of the source.
In one study, we asked people to recall the most recent favor they had received and who had done it for them. Most people wrote about favors from friends or family, such as a ride to the airport or taking care of a child.
Importantly, there were no systematic power dynamics described in these descriptions.
Then we randomly assigned half the participants to complete an exercise that would make them feel powerful and half to complete a neutral exercise. When we then asked everyone to think back to the favor they had described earlier and report why they thought the favor-giver had acted thus, we found that feelings of power dramatically altered reactions to the favor.
Simply making people feel powerful made them more likely to report that the favor had been selfishly motivated. Those in power saw, for example, a friend’s favor through a cynical lens, as being driven by more opportunistic and conniving intentions.”
So not pretty. But this experience as my new hotel, where they treat me like Royalty. I spoke to a staff member, a woman I particularly like:
Me: You treat me so wonderfully! I do not know what I do to deserve it.
She: You treat us wonderfully, that is why.
Me: Wow! I never thought of that, I guess that makes sense.
So things are not all rosy with me – at all. The knee is not getting any better and I can barely walk without being in pain. However, I came to grips with it – if it gets or continues to be that bad I can just be in a wheelchair. I am at the airport anyway – Air Emeritus staff push me around. When I go to Dubai I can probably get a wheelchair so that I can see the sights that I want to see. I am going to need a pusher – I actually know quite a few people there, one of them should be able to push me. When I am back in San Francisco I have Personal Driver, and my walker and a stick. It is not easy to look at five more months of pain but I can do it. Did it in 2019 and I can do it in 2020. Unfortunately!
I left one of my phones in the lobby of my old hotel. The staff here worked with the staff there and it came special delivery this morning. Along with it was a personal item left in my room. I am not telling what that personal item was – but it is hilariously funny.
Today is a lazy day. More writing. Was going to take a taxi to town but pain is getting in the way.
The picture is of Trudeau looking suspiciously like the Crown Prince of Dubai.
