Waking Up Miserable for No Known Reason But Getting Cheered Up By Writing This Blog and Reaching Out Through Instagram; My London Contacts, a Steadily Growing List; Flat Whites, An Adam in Every Port; Some Sadness But Recovery Again

Yesterday i woke full of energy, enthusiasts and drive. I has discovered much to my chagrin that my US passport had expired so I was highly motivated to make an appointment at the American Consulate to get a renewal. It is necessary for my Sotheby’s admission process as my student visa will be attached to my US passport. Next, a group email to my friends in the UK. It was a remedial action trying not to repeat the isolative situation found here in Canada – where I have friends but none of them know one another. Isolate can be the word of the day: set/keep apart, segregate, detach, cut off, shut away, keep in solitude, quarantine, cloister, seclude, sequester. ANTONYMS integrate. My Canadian friends were kept in solitude from one another and it seemed a good idea to integrate my UK friends. So I patiently went through my email addresses and listed all those to whom I feel connected. It was rather a mind boggling experience as there were fourteen people. That is a lot of people. None of them were family, none of them were lovers and I had lived in London for only two and a half years. Moreover, many of them had at least met each other and some knew one another quite intimately. I do not know what to make of that – the contrast between here and there. For many reasons it would be painful for me to make a list of those to whom I presently feel affiliation in Canada. It is a learning experience for me to define words, therefore affiliation will be explored. Affiliation: association with, connection with/to, alliance with/to, alignment with, link with/to, attachment to, tie with/to, relationship with/to, fellowship with, partnership with, coalition with, union with; amalgamation with, incorporation into, integration into, federation with, confederation with..

I wrote to a dear friend telling him of a failed relationship.

He: Sorry to hear about it, but there are better things ahead.

Me: Better things and better men.Hahaha. There is Prince Charles, should he leave Camilla and marry me I would be the Queen of England. I am cuter than Camila. Got my sense of humour back. Affectionately, Alexis

So to this friend I feel a connection, an attachment, a fellowship, an alliance. All of those words are true and describe in different ways what it feels like to be close to a person. A sense of identification that is far different from romantic love.

But more good news about the potential for connection in London. I converse with a man from London on Instagram. Not one of those ridiculous encounters discussed on a prior blog but ones in which we comment on one another’s entries. Anyway, and honest to goodness, this is what he said:

He: When you get to London I am gonna show you where the best flat whites are….

Me: I did a mass email to my friends in London letting them know of my evolving plans. If you give me your email address I can include you on the list. I almost fainted when I counted them -14. I cannot wait to come back. All that and flat whites too. Hahahaha

And then this! It is an email whose subject line is I misunderstood and there is an Adam in Every Port.

Me: Chris, my blog master, screens all messages and I never see them. However, he sent one yesterday with the caption “Do you remember him XX” The message, from an Adam, read. “We met purely by chance, at a Parisian cafe in the centre of Reykjavik…short and sweet and colourful. Maybe heads up in London Town.” So I may have an Adam in every port, what an ambition!

He: No response yet but no worries as I am leaving the port of Vancouver.

Yikes, my life is going to get crowded and I am supposed to be studying.

But it is going to be difficult to leave Vancouver I am slowly realizing. I was gone for three weeks. A man in a restaurant I used to frequent, Dunn’s said:

He: We miss you every day.

Me: Oh my God, I am going to cry. I did but I turned my face to the wall so he didn’t have to see and I recovered and talked about bringing my book to his daughter.

The same thing happened at the Minami Restaurant. I went there and one of the sushi chefs and I have this great time together joking and laughing. I did an Instagram video of the two of us laughing which so far has had 113 views but only two likes. Huh? What is not to like? And how hard can it be? But the two likes are so precious – Tracey in New Zealand and Shabz in London. But after the filming one of Laughing Man’s coworkers told me that Laughing Man has talked about missing me to everyone and later one of the managers said that he had missed me. Then I went to Shoppers Drug Mart and the cashier said:

He: You must have been away. We missed you.

Me: OMG thank you! That touches me, but I will not cry.

Some silly woman was doing self check-out which actually operates to reduce employment, as mentioned in an earlier blog on poverty. I told her so but she didn’t listen and by the way, dear, machines do not miss you when you to to New York and San Francisco and King’s County Jail in Seattle.

A dear and sensitive friend sent an email opened this morning. We spoke of many things but she asked:

She: You are showing amazing resilience after such a traumatic experience, but I’m not sure you are revealing what you are really feeling. Have you written about it and I don’t mean on the blog?

Me: Your other stroke of genius is to ask about whether or not I have written about the experience. The answer is no and I cannot. I would sink into hopeless despair and that would serve no purpose. Just as I could never write of my early extensive childhood abuse.

But just to kindly take you back to funny here is this. I have been watching This Hour Has 22 Minutes, a hilarious Canadian comedy show which I shall miss when I am in London. They did a fake Washington correspondent interview where the guy, speaking of Trump says:

He: EVERYTHING that man has done is impeachable and I do not think his hair is real, how could it be!

I have a relatively lazy day. I am going to see my precious Amy and get a pedicure. My toes are an utter mess after I managed to rip off the toenail off my right toe when I was in Vancouver. So with a fresh pedicure I can dance, not at my wedding, but at the opening of Ombre which is scheduled for this evening at nine. I think I will do a live video with my toes and put it on Instagram.

You do not get a picture, instead you can go on Instagram where I am alexismctwit and witness laughter. And you better click the like button, how much effort will that take???? Perhaps my toes will be featured by then.

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