Being An Outsider; Saying Good bye; The New Year where it is Off to New York City, San Francisco

This blog has spoken to the issue of what it means to leave one’s country or origin, to immigrate to another land.  It feels like you do not belong anywhere. An outsider when first moving to the USA in 1967 and then the slow realization of feeling like an outsider in Canada. But the emotional state now is even stranger as I know I will soon leave Vancouver, never to return. It is a painful experience in many ways. The look of dismay that crosses the face of those who care about me is heart wrenching. It feels as if I have betrayed them but I have not, just gone to follow my dream. It felt that way when I first left Marin for London, although at the time I did intend to return. Little did I know that the experience would change me forever. Vancouver has not changed me – certainly gave me experiences never to be found elsewhere particularly when I trod in the circles of the rich (not famous but rich(. I heard something the other day that had impact. A man was speaking of the underworld, a society that caters to money laundering. The people that accept cash for houses, expensive cars and luxury items, he deemed, were criminals. To that I would agree. So s city, the money laundering capital of the world, is crowded with white collar criminals. That city is, of course, Vancouver.  Yesterday I also learned of the increasing corruption of a man I once knew. It was a humbling experience – recognition of what I knew to be true but nonetheless not welcome. There is nothing I can do to correct either of those circumstances so this makes my leave taking a relief but there are people I care about and will leave behind. But, as usual, I attempt to remain upbeat and cheerful and enjoy my remaining moments with those close to me. As I write Nichole is texting me with questions concerning the delivery of our Chinese food, I am certain we will remain in touch with each other and have a lovely evening of Christmas and Chinese.

Massive plans are being made for the New Year. I will be off to NYC the first week of January. It will be an exciting trip as I will be visiting two people very dear to me as well as museum crawling with Kalthleen who will be there visitng friends and setting up contacts for her work. We have already picked out three or four museums that we MUST see. I guess I will see some theatre, take some long walks in Central Park. No ice skating for me this year with my bum knee and all but I am getting a bit old for that anyway. I have been to New York perhaps four or five times in the past. There is a Sotheby’s there and I plan to visit the campus.

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