Well I had the strangest New Year’s Eve ever. Stranger even then marrying an extremely destructive man that of which I managed to do twenty odd years ago. It began when I met two young women who hailed from California at the Vancouver Art Gallery. We were viewing an exhibit (no longer there) called Entangled. We were not impressed but after laughing it up I suggested we go to lunch. A wonderful repast at Italian Kitchen with Giovanni coming over and talking to us. Then to my apartment – the two were going out dancing (not me) so one took a shower. The shower would not turn off and water kept pouring out of the faucet. I called the wonderful realtor Klaus and soon a plumber appeared. The plumber said that he came out that holiday evening because Klaus is such a great guy – he would not have appeared at my door step if Klaus was a looser.
This does fit into my resolution for this year and all years to follow. It is best to be positive, to heap praise on those that deserve it and just ignore and walk away from those who do not. During this past year I faced so many obstacles and I have felt put upon.
Me: Why is it my job to cheer up the whole damn world?
Alter Ego: Well, for one thing you are good at it.
Me: But some people do not deserve to be cheered up!
Alter Ego: So just cheer up the people that deserve to be.
Me: Such a good idea! Thank you, Alter Ego.
So that is sort of what I do and at least two times a day someone says: “You made my day!”
But I am serious as well and been wrestling with the dilemma of what to do with my new found fame. I think I found an answer. The other day I was listening to CBC’s podcast Ideas. I began listening to All in the Family: Understanding and Healing Childhood Trauma. I could not finish it, I had to stop as I feared the graphic details would incite a post traumatic stress incident. I was severely abused as a child. But the underlying tenet of this broadcast was that one is scarred forever. I do think that it is true but it is possible to overcome some of it and go on to lead a productive life. I have. Goodness knows it is not a life without blips and I have terrible taste in men – the ones I marry and/or have affairs with anyway. But I am cheerful (see prior paragraph).
So I am resolved to be a role model. Allowing oneself to be a victim is not an answer to the problem of abuse. Just as having children is probably not a good idea either because statistically speaking one is prone to repeat the abuse. I did not have children, it was a conscious choice and I have never regretted that decision. I briefly had grandchildren and that was a real treat but they went away after the divorce from the third husband (who was the legitimate grandparent).
My friends are writing me with their determinations for this year. I am already doing most of the things they are proposing for their lives. I not only joined the gym, I go regularly but, of course, I have Hottie and they do not. This interchange actually took place at the Equinox on West Georgia Street in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada.
Me: It is incredible what Hottie has done with my arthritic knees. I can easily walk up and down stairs with no hands and no assistance.
No Nickname: I should get him to help him with my problem!
Me: I do not think Hottie can cure impotency.
No Nickname and Others: Stunned silence and then much laughter.
Please do not ask me how I come up with these things. It has something to do with this.
CCC: What is the difference between a coffee pot and Ms. McBride?
Me: I don’t know. I give up. Tell me.
CCC: The coffee pot has a filter.
By the way, A.H.B. and I were chatting after a class at the Equinox and who should walk in the door but CCC?!?
Me: (in a loud voice) I cannot believe this. What are you doing in a gym CCC? It is a miracle!
CCC: I am here to pick up a power drink for a guest.
Me: The guest should get his own power drink, He needs the exercise and you should be here to exercise!
So an upcoming post is going to be serious and talk more about the Harvey Weinstein situation as I am getting responses to the queries sent to friends and it is interesting. But I do need some time to sort – how I love that expression. Sort – it is British.
The picture is of me and my bear (which unfolds to be a neck support for airplanes). I did name him. His name is Joo Kim. Is not that cute? He probably would not think so!