Waking Up to Rain in Hot Edmonton ; Ameliorate Defined and Illustrated; Underground Passages Leading to Beloved Library; Definitely Time for Some Humour, This From the Magazine Section of The New Yorker Jenny Allen “Come to My House”; Prime of My Life Defined; Photographs of Library Card and Book Retrieved from the Library

It is morning here in Edmonton in what is, at present, the perfect weather place. Soon it will not be, but now it is. Edmonton earned a heat alert as it warned temperatures will hit 30 Celsius. This heat alert is, of course, laughable to those of the Middle East persuasion. But woke up this morning to rain which cooled everything, cleansing everything. Opened my window to breathe in the smell of recent rainfall. Edmontonians do not play with the weather, trying to manipulate it like those in the Middle East, where they seed clouds to make it rain. The rain causing floods as there are no sewer systems. Another example of Middle Eastern folly was back in November of 2019, the Crown Prince of Dubai left London, headed for home to lead a run of 16,000 souls to encourage folks to get out of their cars. However, there are no sidewalks in Dubai, it is impossible to get anywhere, make any progress at all. Slight changes have been made recently but it is impossible at this time to make Dubai a walker friendly environment as it was developed heater skelter with no planning process. The heat also a persistent factor – one needs the air conditioning of automobiles to ameliorate the stifling heat.

Edmonton showed greater foresight. Rather than attempting to ameliorate the frigid  temperatures, to make the inhospitable more hospitable, underground walkways and shopping areas have been installed. None of thee comfort zones were in place when I left fifty-five years ago.
Ameliorate means to make (something bad or unsatisfactory) better. Many, many synonyms: improve, make better, better, make improvements to, enhance, help, benefit, boost, raise, amend, rectify, reform; relieve, ease, mitigate, retrieve; correct, right, put right, set right, put to rights, sort out, clear up, deal with, remedy, repair, fix, cure, heal, mend, make good, resolve, settle, redress, square; tweak, patch up.

Edmonton built underground passages, enhances, mitigated, mended, tweaked and patched up the grounds of the Alberta Legislature Buildings so that I may walk in comfort t my morning breakfasts and increasingly important – to the Legislative Library. The Library is rapidly becoming my home away from home. Yesterday got a library card, put the photo on Instagram saying: The best things in life are free. My new library card. – the library is forty giant steps and twenty baby steps from my apartment. It is an amazing place. When I went apartment hunting I did NOT say I wanted a place close to this stellar spot but like magic it was there. And underground walkways for the winter. I am blessed. I

I shall include the photo of my card AND a photo of the book I was able to bring home with me. Later blogs shall review the book and its contents.

As all gentle readers may know I live alone. Fiercely independent, cannot imagine having a man (or beast) underfoot. Found the most hilarious article in the magazine section of The New Yorker wherein Jenny Allen advertises “Come On To My House”. It is definitely funny and, except for the cat, somewhat reflects my current situation. It is perfect!

  “Calling all  cute guys! Guess what? I’m ready – to have a man in my life. I’ve been on my own for a while now, but I feel totally ready for a relationship. And I guess it’s time, before I get stuck in my ways. What ways? I don’t have any ways. I’m easy. Like, if your hang a towel on the bathroom doorknob after you’ve taken a shower, or forget to close the kitchen cur[boards, or screw on the top of the peanut butter jar in an uneven way, I won’t be mad. Not too mad. But, don’t do it..
  Will you be bringing a lot of random stuff with you when you move in? Clothes and shoes and whatnot? That’s fine! I have an extra bedroom closet for you! You’ll have to keep the door open for ventilation, because Topper’s kitty-litter box is in there but I don’t think Topper will mind. I’ll ask him first, though.
  Speaking of the bedroom, it is true that I sleep with the other side of the bed strewn with books and magazines, my phone, my laptop playing whatever I fell asleep watching, a half-eaten bag of Herr’s potatoe chips, and nail clippers. Now that side is going to be your side. You can just shove all that stuff over to my side I won’t mind. That way it will be right there when I wake up, which I do, six or ten times a night, and turn on all the lights to entertain myself or trim my toenails.
   Also, my side of the bed has a big, body-shaped dip in it because I’ve slept on that side for a long time. Your side is a lot higher, so you might roll into my side when you a sleeping. Don’t do that. Just go into the other room and sleep on the coach with Topper a.k.a.the Greatest Cat who ever lived. Don’t try to move him though. Cats have claws, and those sharp little teeth for a reason.
    I have a very full schedule every day. I am up at to do my Mind-ful Tap Dancing practice, which I do in the bedroom so I can watch myself in the full-length mirror. Honestly, I do not know how I would make it through the day without my tap-dancing practice. There is n nothing like it to help you focus in the present moment and to melt your cares away. I do it for three hours. Join me if you like.
    I work every day from home but it is O.K. with me if you work at home, too.  Just find someone else’s home. Kidding!!! You can work on you side of the bed, or in the bathtub, like Dalton Trumbo. Living alone, I admit, has made me a little more sensitive about ambient noises while I am trying to concentrate, which is why I wear two sets of headphones , one on top of one another. Even if you say nothing I will be able to feel the vibrations of you tiptoeing around in your socks, and avoid doing that.”

Allen continues on, describing her relationship with the Scrabble playing cat. Perhaps more details in a subsequent blog. She ends beautifully:

“Warning: we have a mean couple living jus below us, so be prepared. They won’t say hello, and if they’re in the elevator and see me coming through the lobby, they never hold the door. They’re ‘bothered’ by the tap dancing they tell me. I’ve explained that we all live here together, in community, but you know how some people are, thinking only of themselves. “

Priceless, here is a woman who can think only of herself. Cannot imagine how her tap-dancing at dawn for three hours might affect someone. She is, of course, a narcissist. This is so unfortunately, horribly true about Alexis McBride. Narcissistic men fall for me, even now when I am past my prime (so to speak). It never works out, NEVER. Now I can spot them early, do not marry them and as I am true to the islamic faith, therefore do not sleep with them. I guess I will get a stick and beat them off. The stick could say: “For Narcissists Only.”

Past my prime is an idiom speaking of the bst, most successful, mot productive stage. Used in a sentence.  The horse retired from racing while still in his prime.  Also, She was in the prime of her working life when she retired, but she continued as a consultant. It can also mean: No longer in a state or condition of peak performance. But if forced to admit it, I shall. I am not past my prime – in any arena of my life. Hahahaha

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