We Owe All of This to My Computer Guru, His Wife Clare and Hound Dog Beryl; Humour Before the Days of Bad Language; Collaboration Defined;  I Pave the Road, You Drive the Car; No. 18 is My Favorite; Ending with Me in an Alberta Tartan Scarf with a Little MacBeth Thrown In For Good Measure

This email was received from my faithful Computer Guru Chris, We are a team, a collaboration to end all collaborations. A collaboration is the action of working with someone to produce or create something:. In collaboration with means something produced or created by collaboration. Used in a sentence: Her recent opera was a collaboration with Lessing. The origin of the word mid 19th century: from Latin collaboratio(n-), from collaborare ‘work together’.
Synonyms of this definition are: cooperation, alliance, partnership, participation, combination, association, concert; teamwork, joint effort, working together
 I opened the following email. It was such incredible fun and it really must be shared. .

Hey Alexis, always quality over quantity eh.. btw I found this small collection of insults online and I thought of you, in the nicest way of course!

These insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

  1. “He had delusions of adequacy ” Walter Kerr
  2. “He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”- Winston Churchill
  3. “I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure. – Clarence Darrow
  4. “He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.”-William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
  5. “Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?”- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
  6. “Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.” – Moses Hadas
  7. “I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” – Mark Twain
  8. “He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.” – Oscar Wilde
  9. “I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one.” -George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
  10. “Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second… if there is one.” – Winston Churchill, in response
  11. “I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here” – Stephen Bishop
  12. “He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” – John Bright
  13. “I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” – Irvin S. Cobb
  14. “He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” – Samuel Johnson
  15. “He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up. – Paul Keating
  16. “He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” – Forrest Tucker
  17. “Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?” – Mark Twain
  18. “His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” – Mae West
  19. “Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” – Oscar Wilde
  20. “He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.” – Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
  21. “He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” – Billy Wilder
  22. “I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I’m afraid this wasn’t it.” – Groucho Marx
  23. The exchange between Winston Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, “If you were my husband I’d give you poison.” He said, “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”
  24. “He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.” – Abraham Lincoln
  25. “There’s nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won’t cure.” — Jack E. Leonard
  26. “They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.” — Thomas Brackett Reed
  27. “He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame them.” — James Reston (about Richard Nixon) —Robert L Truesdell

They are all brilliant but my favorite at the moment is #18 – the one about keeping the stork.
I was familiar with #23, the exchange between Lady Astor and Winston Churchill. I have a very special memory concerning the correspondence between those two individuals.
It was during during a visit to London in 2018, dining at the glorious Rex Whistler Restaurant in the Tate Britain. I was suddenly struck with a strange thought, rose from my table to speak to a wonderful woman who was temporarily serving as the barista.
Me: I just had a horrible thought. I think I might be destined to be great. How could I ever be prepared for that?
She: Alexis, don’t worry. If you are going to be great, you will be ready.
Me: Okay. I will take your word for it.

Two days later I spoke of this conversation to her boss, a man who I utterly adored. We had so much fun together, we laughed all the time but were serious as well. He nodded when told him of the conversation.
He: Yes Alexis. Winston Churchill once said that most people in the world were worms but he was a glow worm. You are a glow worm Alexis

Well I did not take his word for it, instead Googled it. Did discover that indeed Churchill had said that to Lady Astor. They were dear friends and wrote letters to one another, this written in their correspondence.

Over the last three years I have lost contact with that man, the boss. He has made a recent appearance on Instagram but persistently avoids contact with me. To say the very least my feelings were hurt but then received some unexpected comfort, also through Instagram (of all places). A dear friend, lives in Texas but met at the Abu Dhabi Louvre posted  a photograph on Instagram with this caption:
She: Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me” – Michael Scott.
I deftly and publicly responded.
Me: I guess that is me. All of those people terrified because they love  me so much. Hahaha 🤣.

But I do think that it is true for his man. He a friend, not a lover. The thought gives me comfort. I may be wrong, I may be right. But my believing this hurts no one. I believe this about many of my beliefs in the Islamic faith. I may be right, I may be wrong but my beliefs hurt no one. Some aspects of my core beliefs I keep to myself Well, of course Allah knows and that is all that is important. I do not need to convince the world and they that dwell therein, so do not even try.

The photograph attached is me. What is around my head? An Alberta tartan scarf purchased yesterday at the Legislative gift shop. More about that visit tomorrow or tomorrow and tomorrow.
“— To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signifying nothing.”
— Macbeth (Act 5, Scene 5, lines 17–28.

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