Today is Day Two of My Private Ramadan which began two days late. Text conversations with my Texan friends about the day. First to Blogging Brooke .
Me: Beginning Ramadan two days late. I guess I will talk about it on the blog It feels good. The discipline and all. Just tack on two days at the end.
She: Smart! Looking forward to reading.
Me: Done. I sent it to Raschid first. He says he is my biggest fan. But you could compete if you wish. Hahahah
She: I will compete!
Me: You are SO funny. He said it was awesome and he liked the way I disguised him – making him a Sheikh. Had a bad dream. Going back to sleep.
Also words with her friend, also met at the Fouquet Restaurant at the Louvre.
Me: I feel at peace today and ready for the discipline of Ramadan.
She: Good luck. I hope it brings you peace.
Me: It has so far but except for a bad dream.
She: Oh no! Was everything okay when you woke up.
Me: Not quite but getting there. I used to analyze my dreams but do not anymore. Dreams are often back things in the past and you just have to remind oneself that that was then and this is now,
The dream was more than a bit unusual. A bat had landed in my hair and I was thoroughly calm but searching for someone to get it out .The search was headed by a well meaning man who did not know what he was doing but actually stood in the way of finding competent help. He was going to call a friend to come and help him when I woke up.
I woke up and said to myself.
Me: Stupid you should have just gone to the Emergency Room of a hospital.
Alter Ego: That is so right. The independent you would have done that but somehow you were looking to a mere mortal man to help you.
Me: So true. Allah refers to them as mere mortal man and encourages those who follow him to rely on him instead. The dream was a warning (in a way) and is a repetition of the past.
The Texas friends conversation took place at 3 in the morning. It is convenient to have friends in different time zones when bad dreams strike. Back to sleep then the alarm signaled that it was breakfast time before sunrise. Breakfast during Ramadan does have an Arabic name but I cannot find it at the present moment. Looking through Instagram material to find with no luck but discovered I now have 699 followers. When first coming to the UAE had only about 400. I am also ruthless, blocking great numbers of people. If I were not so picky I might have 1000 – I would rather have 700 responsive, polite people that I have met rather than vast hordes of silent and/or rude individuals. I have enough silence from the blog. Hahaha. It is impossible to reach me through the blog and was designed that way in the very beginning.
A brilliant decision.
Preparing for a day when I emerge from the hotel. To the Yas Mall for a pcr test, to the bank,To Western Union helpful store, to the Apple Store, for some groceries and then for a mani and pedi – usually have those on Sunday but switched days. It is an effort to go outside the walls of this hotel during Ramadan. I am retreating from this world. The hotel is safe, rather like a womb. This country is not, nor is the world, come to think of it.
A song keeps echoing in my mind. If Ever I Would Leave You
Here are the lyrics.
If ever I would leave you
It wouldn’t be in summer
Seeing you in summer
I never would go
Your hair streaked with sunlight
Your lips red as flame
Your face with a lustre
That puts gold to shame!
But if I’d ever leave you
It couldn’t be in autumn
How I’d leave in autumn
I never will know
I’ve seen how you sparkle
When fall nips the air
I know you in autumn
And I must be there
And could I leave you
Running merrily through the snow?
Or on a wintry evening
When you catch the fire’s glow?
If ever I would leave you
How could it be in springtime?
Knowing how in spring I’m bewitched by you so?
Oh, no! Not in springtime!
Summer, winter or fall!
No, never could I leave you at all!
This song was written by Robert Goulet, who was (and I guess is, in Paradise) a Canadian) Go on You Tube an listen you may weep.
This romantic song, taking center piece in this blog written during Ramadan is placed here for a reason. As I have stated before, too much attention has been paid to ‘romantic love’ in Western societies. This song is crooned to a woman – but the sad fact of life is that he will have to leave her when she dies. Nothing goes on forever in Western societies, death ends everything and unless one could arrange simultaneous ‘kicking the buckets’
Kicking the bucket is a term known to date from at least the 16th century. The more interesting (and probably apochryphal) origin relates to suicides who would stand on a large bucket with noose around the neck and, at the moment of their choosing, would kick away the bucket.
But more about the phrase. “MOST etymologists agree that the “bucket” refers to a kind of yoke that was used to hold pigs by their heels so that they could be slaughtered, and was particularly used in parts of Norfolk. The subsequent death-throe spasms of the unfortunate animals created the impression that they were “kicking the bucket”. The derivation is either from Old French buquet (a balance) or the fact that the raising of the yoke on a pulley resembled a bucket being lifted from a well. The term is known to date from at least the 16th century. The more interesting (and probably apochryphal) origin relates to suicides who would stand on a large bucket with noose around the neck and, at the moment of their choosing, would kick away the bucket.” The synonyms are sad: die; decease; perish; go; exit; pass away; expire; pass; cash in one’s chips; buy the farm; conk; give-up the ghost; drop dead; pop off; choke; croak; snuff it; change state; turn; die out; die off; die down, What is my favorite?? Obviously buy the farm. Perhaps give-up the ghost is a close second. Pop off has to be the third. Please pick your favorites.
Robert is going to leave her. Reliance on one person to fulfill all of one’s needs is a recent phenomena. Extended families were the norm, even in Western societies before WWII. Romantic love became the foundation of society, in a strange way. Therefore, the songs, the eulogizing of ‘soul mates’ and the concept that there was one person in the whole world for you. Gotta find the guy, gotta get married. But it was all basic b.s. – founded upon economic interests. More about that later, I do suppose. It is obvious and evident to anyone with a sense of history (which by the way,, the vast majority of people do not have.)
This song does have relevance during Ramadan because it is Allah, not mere mortal men, it is He never ever leaves you if you are faithful to the faith. I am convinced that Allah will never leave me – not is Spring, not in Summer, not in Fall. No never will He leave me at all.
The photograph attached to the blog is a bit unusual as it is my toes, preview on a reel in Instagram. This a conversation with the Shikh
Me: Having a pedi and a mani. Sexiest toes forever. Will send a photo.
He: Wow Yummy Yummy
Me: Did a reel of toes on Instagram. You have to share my toes with the world.
Me: My toes are black with sparkles. You are black with sparkles. We match. I am SO funny.
He: Take care! Remember you are fasting.
Me: I am taking care. In bed and blogging. Will send when I am done.
I will take another toe picture and attach to blog. Black toenails with sparkles.