I awoke to a text message from a man in a faraway land:
He: Happy New Month My Angel
Me: I am awake. But no good morning message from you. Excuse Me!
Me: But you did wish me happy month. How sweet.
So that is not exactly an angelic response, and to be totally honest, I ain’t no angel, but does it hurt anyone to have him think that I am? The jury is still out on that one. That is a wonderful phrase which means If the jury is (still) out on a subject, people do not yet know the answer or have not yet decided if it is good or bad:
So it was interesting to see a somewhat related story on today’s NPR newsletter. Is It Ok to Lie About Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. It is written by Cory Turner and Anya Kamenetz.
“In general, we try to be pretty honest people. I mean we’re journalists. But when it comes to Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the tooth fairy, or whatever it is in your family … is it bad to lie to your kids to keep the magic alive?
Cory’s gotten deep into the Santa ruse: setting out the reindeer snack, calling into the Santa tracker on Christmas Eve. Anya wrote notes impersonating the Tooth Fairy and when that didn’t work, she even set up a phone call! The con has gotten really long, and the kids might be on to us. We know we’re not alone.
Here are four tips for handling that awkward moment when your kids start doubting the world of magic. Luckily Rosemarie Truglio, a childhood development specialist and senior vice president of Education and Research at Sesame Workshop, is going to help us figure out how — and how long — to keep the magic alive.”
First of all Truglio comforts by stating: “You are not lying. You’re entering their world of make-believe. It’s actually healthy, she says, to engage with kids in this world of make-believe. “How did you feel when you were a child?” she says. “It is that warm spot in your heart that we remember and we want to convey to our children.”
Then she suggests that a parent listen carefully because kids might not be ready for the truth. She gives the example of her son, who went to a Jewish school. His classmates told him there was no Santa Claus. She dodged the answer by pointing out that the family was Catholic and celebrated Christmas wheels Jewish people did not. “That’s all he needed at that moment. He wasn’t — he didn’t want to give up on the magic of Santa.””
But “when the gig is up (you’ll know!), come clean and be prepared for big feelings. It happened when her son was 10. She told him the truth. “The conversation was difficult — her son was upset. He knew Santa didn’t exist, but he was holding on to the magic”
But the last piece of advice was, in one way, the best. “Find new ways to keep the magic alive” She provides this example; “Still to this day, he’ll say, you know, I know I have to make a list. But can you surprise me? Surprise me with something that’s not on the list,” Truglio says. “And it’s about — that surprise reminds him of that special time, the magic of Christmas morning.”
Keeping the magic alive, however you choose to do it, it’s not just good for kids. It’s good for everybody..
This article may have some applicability to the situation before us – a man thinks I am an angel, calls me his angel repeatedly. One could argue that he is in a world of make believe, as all people are early in a relationship. Therefore I have no duty, none at all, of disabusing him of the notion. Disabuse is, of course, to undeceive, correct, set right/straight, open the eyes of, enlighten, reveal the truth to, wake up, disenchant, shatter the illusions of, make sadder and wiser. Why should I shatter his illusions, disenchant him or set him straight. Because, the second tenant is applicable – he is not ready to hear the truth at the present time. Not at all prepared for it. When he is confronted with the devil in me, the gig will be up then we will move to the third tenant. He will be upset, no doubt about that. But here is the thing – we will find ways of keeping the magic alive and that will be good for everybody. Absolutely everybody! I shall not be graphic and explain how we night keep the magic alive but people have been doing it for ages and as a matter of fact it is responsible for populating the world.
Happy New Month, said he. It will be an extremely eventful month – perhaps more so than ever could be imagined. Routine events like doctor appointments, but an orientation at the Asian Museum, lots of water aerobics at the Presidio YMCA, seeing a precious person that I have not seen in five years and then off to London. And those are the things I know about, other surprises appear to be forthcoming.
I sent CPI a photograph of the glamorous me. She, who has known me since high school.
She: If not perhaps for the hair, I could pass you on the street and not recognize you. You almost look Asian! “hahaha”
Me: You sure know how to hurt a girl. Hahaha. You know how I have suffered at the hands of certain Chinese. Having water thrown in my face when living in Vancouver and the attack on August 18, 2019. But that is only a handful of people so I am fine. My wonderful make up artist is Asian – Japanese. I took Ikebana Flower Arranging for twenty years. It is only recently that I have suffered at the hands of Chinese.
Every once in awhile I think that this is the weirdest blog in existence – the things I talk about and they are all true. I guess it comes from living an eccentric life and taking risks.
The picture is a repeat performance featuring Alexis, looking Asian and her Make Up Artist.