Getting Feedback That Brought Joy; AA’s Lack of Scientific Inquiry and Misuse of the Word Intervention; Minor Mention of the Wedgewood; You Heard it Here First; Wonderful Words From a VSO Musician

As most people know (because I tell them) one cannot reach me through the blog. Chris and I, at the commencement of this blog in January of 2017, agreed that I would be shielded from response. It was an excellent idea and one that has never been regretted. Seldom are responses received but today Chris sent four and I was gladdened by each of them.

The first was from a man met during my stay at Corte Madera Best Western Inn. He and his partner were breakfasting with their two adopted children and they were a joy to behold. The children were so well-mannered, polite, attentive and kind to one another and everyone around them. Naturally I went over to their table and congratulated, not only the children, but also parents who had taught their children their grace and good manners which will hold them in good stead the rest of their lives. Now stead – that is a word that is used in this phrase: stand someone in good stead be advantageous or useful to someone in the future: his early training stood him in good stead. How do these words just pop into my head? I have no idea how or why but they do. Then upon looking them up find they are the perfect word. It is a recent gift, one formed since writing this blog but it was not apparent in the beginning.

But more about this couple. One of the men is an author, as well as being a therapist and an amazing parent. His book is called Ucoping by Howard Acosta and can be found on Amazon.

Then heard from a ‘fan’ at the snobby Wedgewood Hotel in Vancouver. Well most (all except for the General Manager) are not snobby but unfortunately for everyone – that guy is in charge. I do forget his name. But his ‘intervention’ allowed me to have a wonderful time with Tracey and Mike and got to see Steveston and saved a lot of money and then to Mr. Ho’s Restaurant n Burnaby. Sometimes when something bad happens, then something super good happens. What is an intervention? Has it been corrupted my AA. Let us look. Its synonyms are: involvement, intercession, interceding, interposing, interposition; mediation, mediator ship, arbitration, conciliation, peacemaking; interference, intrusion, meddling; rare arbitrament.

One can see that AA has corrupted the meaning of the word. When a gang of people complain to a person about their drinking it is not exactly arbitrate, peacemaking, or conciliation ormediatorsghp. AA is dangerous because it is not scientific and prevents scientific research into alcoholism because of their insistence on confidentiality. Leading researchers and medical professionals say that their tactics are harmful. I researched this at an earlier time in my life, my research materials have not been rescued from the storage facility but the subject may come up again. It is not that AA is not good for some people but it is not good for most. Alcoholism is an illness an we do not blame people for being sick. AA blames people for their sickness, alcoholism and often label people who are Not alcoholics ALCOHOLICS. AA can give meaning to people’s lives because they are bereft of other human contact but it is not the only ‘treament’ for drinking. You heard it here first.

So, inspired by You Head It Here First I googled it and found an amazing song – you absolutely must do it. Not only are the sentiments of the song beautify there is a video that shows this amazing interaction between a couple. But it is rather amazing that at the very moment that I am listening to this sentimental song I am texting a man. It is extremely weird and very unlikely. Most unlikely. He is funny and finds me hilarious according to his word – which is in writing and therefore enforceable. Whatever that might mean, sometimes it is hell to be an attorney (even a retired one).

The following is written the next morning. I do admit to sinning yesterday – Netflix binge watching the incredible Canadian television series Schitt’s Creek. I became a fan in my Vancouver days thinking that I would be giving the characters and their story up. One can imagine my joy when I discover Netflix and then discover that I can watch every episode of this, my favourite of all times. I had not seen the beginning episodes – so I basked and laughed and laughed and laughed. An altogether strange day but rather productive as laundry done, apartment put in order and food preparation taking place. I did Instagram my omelette. It was a concoction of pure delight with carmelized onions, cheese, sour cream and salsa. The guy I was texting said that the was a master chef – is not that weird beyond belief. At first I suggested a competition but then decided we could just cook for one another. It would be fun to share responsibilities, never tried that before.

But my contentment and full heart was absolutely filled to the brim. New readers may not know but, on a return visit to Vancouver, I was treated most rudely by the head of marketing man for the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra. I complained vociferously via but received no official word. But an attempt to reach me on the blog and Chris wisely sent in on.

The email began: “As a VSO musician who greatly appreciate your audience attendance and your generous support I would like to apologize for how you were treated by our organization on your last visit. The email further elaborated saying that musicians had no control over management or the people they hire and if they did the incident would not have occurred. I promptly wrote back:

Me: I appreciate your reaching out to me. I do admit to feeling rather burned and bummed. I have so much respect for the VSO – it was one of the only bright spots. I grew to despise Vancouver and felt so relieved to leave at the end of March. I found the Vancouver symphony listeners dull and listless – friends in different locales contrasted their passivity with those experienced in other venues. I find it amazing and an enormous tribute to you musicians to maintain the quality of your work in the midst of such mediocrity.

But I have been rewarded in that I moved to San Francisco, live in Hayes Valley and now am in extremely close proximity to Davies Hall, to the Opera and SF Ballet. It brought joy to my heart to learn that your extremely vivacious and able President has moved onto the SF Ballet. I shall transfer my enthusiasm to this venue and hop, skip and jump the four blocks to attend their performances and perhaps volunteer. I would love to listen to the VSO again but have no desire whatsoever to return to Vancouver, even for a visit. But perhaps you will come my way.

Again, thank you for reaching out to me. I am most appreciative. Please feel free to share this email with your colleagues.

In summary: Life is exceedingly good and it is impossible to ask for more. I feel blessed. The photograph is the omelette, prepared by Yours Truly.

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