A Treasure Trove of Anecdotes; Thoughts on Empathy; CHASED; The Frog Turns Into a Prince

My life has become a treasure trove of anecdotes. I keep running into people, having amazing conversations, writing them down and then not mentioning them on this blog because there are so many. This from my dentist’s office:

Me: I am going to leave with dignity

She: Too late for that.

Then a sage remark from a woman lunching at Max’s with her daughter and grandson.

She: It is not where you start, it is how you finish. A

But a trove of wise sayings occurred on the same day as the April 8, 2019 three year old. Two very knowledgable men sat next to me at breakfast and great truths emerged. There was a general discussion of fate, destiny, not having children and relying on one man and one man alone. Here are some of the pithy sayings:

He: Great roses come from shit — the shit fertilizes them and makes them beautiful.

Me: Hmmmm. I guess I am a great rose because I had a pretty turdy background.

The two men spoken to were nicknamed N.J. and M.R.M. and pictured in the April 8, 2019 blog. They were both from LA and had careers that paralleled mine. One man was an educator and the other’s position involved the complex concept of risk management. NJ discussed at length the decision and the implications of not having children. His words were encouraging as he emphasized that a legacy can different forms and that my creativity in each of its forms left a legacy for those that followed, It was encouraging news. He also was rather strident in his insistence that I not limit myself to just one man. Occasionally one clamours for my sole attention.

Perhaps clamour can be the word of the day. This word’s definition: a strongly expressed protest or demand from a large number of people: the growing public clamour for more policemen on the beat.Also demands, call(s), urging, insistence.

It is NJ’s learned opinion that the demands and insistence for soul and only attention be ignored for the following reason. It was rather compelling and actually rather rational. That my positive energy should not be concentrated upon only one but spread about – I suppose rather like manure. Then all would benefit all and not just one. But what about me, is anybody thinking about me? Perhaps the attention of a single good man is what I need. Faithful readers will remember that I am to use CHASED when looking for a guy. Each initial stands for a trait.

C Charismatic

H Humorous

A Available

S Sexy/Smart

E Empathetic

D Dependable

Perhaps if I find all of those qualities in one man I get to limit my attention span. It seems only fair because if you have a public (instead of one) they flit off, which actually these two guys did. I like the word flit: dart, dance, skip, play, dash, trip, flick, skim, flutter, bob, bounce, spring, scoot, hop, gambol, caper, cavort, prance, frisk, scamper; informal beetle.

So no follow up from those two guys they just skipped, bobbed, bounced, gambolled off.

Whereas, the one guy is still around and I just talked to him.

NPR health announced that there was a new study that looked at a concept explored on this blog on several prior occasions. Empathy is an enormous concept. Please read the July 16, 2018 blog wherein I dumped a guy for no empathy. I think he came back and showed the same charming quality and I dumped him for good and to say the very least, I do not miss him at all. It is because I dumped him that I have a man in my life who has empathy and has just shown it. He is marvellous. The other guy is not – is selfish, self-self-centred and a total bore. Good looking, gay, but a bore. The new guy is actually much more handsome and not gay, has empathy and actually loves me. So girlfriends – dump the guy with no empathy – they are not worth the paper they are printed on. They are superficial, thin on depth and soul and full of themselves. That is my advice and you get what you pay for – it is free by the way.

I saw a man who resembled the July 16,2018 man in a restaurant I frequent on Gough Street here in San Francisco. I went to talk to him and he dismissed me saying he was earring his lunch. I coldly looked at him, smiled and said:

Me: Thank you so much for your dismissal of me. It served as a refresher course.

He: (Too bored and self satisfied to respond ).

If that guy loves himself he has bad taste. He does not, of course, and cannot tolerate closeness because he is afraid that people will see through him and know that he is empty and vacuous. That does seem the fate of handsome men who never have to develop any personality because women flock all over them because of their looks. But somehow I have found a man with depth, soul and empathy, I am lucky – you are not going to see his picture because: Get Your Hands Off of Him. He is mine!! I had to kiss a lot of frogs but I have found my Prince.

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