I pass out my blog cards with gay abandon. The receivers often ask the same question.
They: What’s your blog about?
Me: Read it and you will find out.
But then I charmingly relent and give them a brief description.
Me: Well I am funny (said modestly) that is how I pull people in. Nobody wants to read sad and serious things particularly when you live in sad Vancouver. But constant funny gets boring and trivial so people want something serious. So I give them something serious (very serious) like the hated of women, rude children, absentee parents, the horrors of Vancouver, ripped jeans. Trump. Then people sigh and think “Bring back funny!” So I do. It is rather like a roller coaster and it is rather addictive (or so my statistics say). It is time for funny as I have been most serious recently and plan to get most serious yet again.so this blog is going to be funny
F Guy (remember him?) saw a certain resemblance between Mae West and Alexis McBride so with courtesy he sent on some Mae West quotes which I herein repeat.
“I wrote the story myself. It’s about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.”
“Between two evils. I always pick the one I never tried before.”
“I’ll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure”
“Sex is an emotion in motion.”
“Cultivate your curves – they may be dangerous but they won’t be avoided.”
“I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.”
“Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.”
“I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.”
“Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.”
“I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.”
“I am single because I was born that way.”
“Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly,”
“Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present!”
But I do not necessarily need Mae West jokes as my life is quite funny in its own right. The London trip looms and friends were sent a Dance Card so that they can choose a time that is convenient to them. It has circulated to great response and the spots are filling up. I received a two word email response.
He: Prom Queen
Me: I am laughing out loud. You are hysterically funny!.
On the home front (it being Vancouver) there is great interest in my company as well. Five men are vying for my attention. Honest! How to choose between them? I was strolling down Mainland Street the other day and hit upon an idea. There is the chicest of menswear stores there. I strolled in, the men that work there are handsome beyond belief, by the way. I do rather appreciate a well dressed man who wears nice shoes. So I hit upon a rather brilliant idea. Talk about this store and my preferences and then the ablest of the men in question would purchase clothing to advance their cause. They would dress for success. I took some pictures showing chic. But one small problem – I forgot the name of the store. But I shall include it in the next blog..
I had the best day yesterday! I had a personal training session with a wonderful woman. We stretched, it was glorious. I realized how horribly tense I was. Then it was off to VPL to pick up some research that InfoAction had done for me, the results to be included in subsequent blogs (serious maters). I was so pleasantly surprised (in fact shocked) to see that there are now signs telling patrons where things are. I have been complaining vociferously for months that there is no signage, but lo and behold, there it is. I have included a photograph of one of the signs. Then it was back to the YWCA for water aerobics, a soak in the jacuzzi and then to Fingertips where wonderful Amy did my nails in preparation for the trip.
Me: I love you Amy,
She: I love you Alexis
Then to India Bistro, how I love that restaurant, the owner and her son. I emailed Kathleen who lives nearby and she stopped by and had tea. By then I was sitting with a handsome young man by the name of Adam. We went to Kathleen’s nearby studio and she interviewed Adam in the same manner as she interviewed me. When it is published I shall provide the link. Then Adam gave me a ride home. He was off to Columbia on business. We had such a jolly time, the three of us.
Today it is a short trip to my lawyer’s office and then to Vancouver Symphony Orchestra’s Tea and Trumpets. What a day! It is Thanksgiving in the USA today. I am not celebrating in the traditional way but I have so much to be grateful for (as I said to a new found friend in Santa Rosa, California)