Now this may not sound like a big deal to you, but it is to me. After over two years of having gorgeous nails from Amy in Vancouver, I have given it all up. My nails, both toe and hand, are short and contain nothing resembling nail polish. Indications of why this sudden change in my personal appearance are unclear, I did speak to Personal Driver (aka Dubai Guy) about it.
Me: I do think it is because HE has short clipped, very modest nails.
He: But he is a man.
Me: I do know that, but I wish to emulate him in every way.
He: Well ok. You will save a lot of money.
Me Yes, and time. I shall be going au natural.
What does au natural mean? Off to Google to learn this: “You might, for example, admire your friend’s casual, au naturel style, with no makeup or elaborate hairdo. In English, though, it usually means “naked.” The literal French meaning is “in the natural state.”
(Oh by the way, the person I wish to emulate is SSS but not altogether emulating. There will be no skydiving, no falconry, no riding horses, no deep sea diving, no running marathons. But none of this will interfere with my status as the London wife. I can watch horses run around a track, (that is apparently what he does there). I can hike, take pictures, read, those sorts of things). But back to my nails.
These nude nails are a major change because my Amy nails gave great delight. This was an interchange subsequent to the decision to leave Vancouver.
Me: Amy, I have news. Maybe it is good news, maybe it is bad news, It depends!
Amy: What is it? Tell me.
Me: I am leaving Vancouver to live in San Francisco.
At this point Amy starts crying and I start crying as well.
Me: Amy, come with me!
Amy: I can’t because of the kids.
Me: Sell them and come with me.
Amy: There is no market for them.
And at this and, for understandable reasons, we both broke out in laughter and our tears disappeared. No one on earth can do nails the way Amy does – I have been constantly disappointed, therefore I am just giving up. Short, sweet and to the point!
Yesterday I was filling out a YMCA evaluation form. I hate surveys but I do love the Y so I did it. One portion of the form dealt with one’s sexuality and one choice was to be a pansexual. I have never heard the term so, of course, I denied that I was one. But what is a pansexual?
Of course, I looked it up and learned that not limited in sexual choice with regard to biological sex, gender, or gender identity. Or in more simple terms: “Pansexual people are people attracted to people regardless of their gender. The word pansexual comes from the Greek word ‘pan-‘, meaning “all”. … Pansexuality is the opposite of asexuality, as pansexuality means a person may be sexually attracted to anyone, but asexuality means a person is sexually attracted to no one.”
That ain’t me. Do you realize how confusing that would be? I have enough trouble fighting off men – it sounds like I would have to be fighting off men, women, transgenders, bisexuals – you name it! Nope – I am heterosexual, I guess, and that is enough for me. Thank you. Definition of heterosexual: involving or characterized by sexual attraction between people of the opposite sex: heterosexual relationships. Its synonyms are: straight, hetero, het. ANTONYMS homosexual, gay, lesbian. This I guess this confession is the antithesis of my ‘coming out’. I guess one could call it coming in. I am glad to get that out of the way.
So I open my email this morning and, like magic, who should appear? The Sultan (aka SSS). It is complicated but there is the funniest pictures of him clutching a sign that says: “This is my real page, text me here.” Then another photograph illuminates the situation and he alerts people that they should not, if someone suggests, go on other apps to facilitate communication because he would never do that. He recommends that if a person suggests that money be contributed to an orphanage in his name that the person be blocked and reported because he is not creating orphanages or getting money from people for charity. So this was fascinating to me as when living in Vancouver I was prey to cat fishing (as it is apparently called). Some scammer promised an introduction to his father if I gave him a thousand dollars. Needless to say I did not meet the Dad. I am laughing! But it did see usual to open my email and come up with all of this. Actually rather mind boggling. By the way I was catfishes or scammed but it was not successful in that there was no exchange of money. More about that In a subsequent blog. But here are some fun things that happened yesterday at the Presidio YMCA – I was there for water aerobics and a jacuzzi. It was a Saturday so it was extremely crowded. My favourite person was there and we chatted again. She had previously commented upon my ‘skill’, meeting (and sometimes) forming relationships with extremely rich men.
Me: What did you say it was? I did not write it down.
She: It is because you do not want anything. Other people are greedy and want something from these men – but you do not!
Me: My goodness, you are right! The first time I went to lunch in Vancouver with multibillionaire Joo Kim Tiah I paid. I had emailed that I always wanted to take a rich man to lunch, and I was thankful to him for messages he had sent to my ‘wished for’ father who was on his death bed. Everyone who knew Joo Kim said he would never allow me to pay – but he did on the promise that he would pay for lunch the next time. And he did.
But this wonderful woman employee is most insightful and perceptive. She has barely met me but she somehow knows me and them. She has another interesting job – she appraises businesses for tax purposes. All of the folks who need their businesses appraised are very rich. Life is strange!!
But here is something even stranger. I do not wear my eye glasses in the pool. I looked over in the direction of the jacuzzi (some distance away) and I was sure that I saw the Crown Prince of Dubai. Later, when the class was over I walked over to the man – he was not the Crown Prince of Dubai – but he did somewhat resemble him.
Me: From a distance I thought you were the Crown Prince but now I can see that you are not.
He: No I am not. But I wish I was.
Then I was talking in the Women’s locker room saying that I was going to London via Dubai and that I had met the Sultan on a previous trip to London.
She: Maybe he will meet the plane when you get there.
Me: I never thought about that. I suppose, but it does seem rather unlikely. I would, of course, welcome that but no use counting on it.
I tried to take a picture of a rainbow from Personal Driver’s cab. But by the time I got my phone turned on the rainbow had disappeared. But it got posted on Instagram anyway. You can see the Golden Gate Bridge in the distance.