I woke up hoping to find the blog post sent yesterday afternoon. I knew it was there because there was an email from my man, my blog guru Chris.
He: Well well well! Well done Sherlock 🕵️♀️ (I cant believe there was an emoji for Sherlock!)
I am not a big emoji fan but definitely it made me laugh and be horribly proud of he and me. We are a perfect team, all rather amazing. But onto other things, not the blog of yesterday.
It seems like, quite recently, I have been sowing my wild oats. This is the definition from Miriam-Webster. “to have many sexual relationships particularly when one is young
(They look upon his indiscretions as just his sowing his wild oats.). Well, obviously, I am not young – old as a matter of fact. But I also thought that it was what one does before settling down to a serious committed relationship. You have a fling. You see if you are gong to be missing anything. So I recently have had a fling or two – and I say with certainty. No I am not going to be missing anything. What is a fling? It is a a short period of enjoyment or wild behaviour: One final fling before a tranquil retirement.OR a short, spontaneous sexual relationship. Their example, I had a fling with someone when I was at college. That was their example, I did not have a fling with anyone while in college. I was true blue to my betrothed (also known as Husband #1)
I do not have any feelings of guilt – no animals were killed in the making of this movie. (hahaha). I am not married, no one was married. I did not break their hearts, they did not want an ongoing relationship. And I definitely got it out of my system. I felt very desired, extremely desired and so it was good for the ego. But it was all rather meaningless. I am sure for them as well. Sex without love is just a nibble, not a full course meal. Perhaps intercourse but not a glorious ten course dinner. Hahahaha But I have been very celibate since leaving London in March of 2015 – and that is four years and a few months. There have been occasional lapses (as they say) but no one new of any lasting power that I took or went to bed with. I have had one (perhaps two) intense relationships but it/they did not involve sex. It is my expert opinion that if you do not sleep with someone you develop a closer relationship than if you do – particularly early on. If you sleep with someone early in a relationship than that becomes your way of communicating. It is not particularly intimate and so the folks are, for that reason, replaceable. If I were going to settle again into a monogamous relationship with a man I would want him to sow his wild oats as well. Then he can be free of all fantasies about young and pretty woman and be very content with this old broad. I do not jest!
I am relying on memory here. It was an email exchange that took place October 2017.
He: I will try to be faithful.
Me: You have to do more than just try!
He: I will be faithful.
Nothing happened so it does not matter if he was faithful or unfaithful at that time. I was similarly under no obligation to be faithful and I was not. So there! So there! So there! It is important that no one get hurt – if the guy is married is HE that is doing the bad deed, not the ‘other’ woman he is having sex with. That topic was explored in the blog of a new friend. She has the coolest first name Perpetual – her blog is Pep Talks and Fufu. I met her in Vegas when I was there in July. I went there for “Grandson’s” wedding. I did not go to the wedding, he is no longer my “Grandson” and I blocked him on Instagram – along with his bride, who was a guy. He treated me with no respect whatsoever. The wedding was a big publicity stunt. You can read about him on this blog – just type in Grandson in the search engine. He had me flummoxed: baffled, bewildered, mystified, bemused, perplexed, puzzled, confused, confounded, nonplussed, disconcerted, thrown, thrown off balance, at sea, at a loss, disorientated, taken aback; informal bamboozled, discombobulated, fazed, stumped, beat, foxed, floored; Canadian & Australian/NZ informal bushed; archaic wildered, distracted, mazed.
But I made out like a bandit, meeting truly wonderful people like Perpetual and also wonderful Charlene Jenkins. Charlene called me yesterday and we chatted away and laughed. She has a radio programme, at this moment is in Dallas at a woman’s conference. That is not fair! Here I am stuck in San Francis waiting for a knee operation. Here is the link to her radio programme, she sent it to me yesterday. (thenetwork.org.) She is very religious and speaks of prayer and Jesus. She and Joo Kim Tiah would get along very well because he is very religious and believes in prayer and Jesus. Perhaps the two should meet, perhaps I could arrange it. I have a belief system but it does not include prayer and Jesus. Everyone has a right to their beliefs, mine is just different. Joo Kim once tried to convert me – it didn’t take. He did put forth a valiant effort and that man always gets what he wants and he does not take no for an answer, he is rebellious that way.
But to digress, what is making out like a bandit mean? (idiomatic, informal) To profit greatly; to get an excessively good deal.
I got an excessively good deal from Vegas visit – no wedding but instead meeting so many wonderful people including the two women just mentioned. I said in restrained anger to Former Grandson:
Me: You do not deserve me!
He: No response.
He didn’t, he was not what he appeared to be. I may have been thrown off balance by his callous behaviour but, in the end, I was victorious. My goodness, Grandson and Phillipp Posch have something in common. Living well is the best revenge and I am blessed to be living well and great revenge is being heaped upon a few people. l.