I have not had the strength to blog. My life seemed finally to be coming together. I was sure I was on the Straight Path. Then, in one day, several days ago it fell part The first warning was Israel’s attack on Iran but then more personal tragedies almost – betrayals, pain, setbacks. I did try to write – you shall now see the results of my struggles. I have begun to recover, and in ensuing days you shall read about it. But first the bad news, and my feeble attempts.
Received some bad news in my life, not just some – heaps of it. First tried to be brave about it all, without a lot of luck. Suddenly though of a strange saying. That’s the way the cookie crumbles, the mop flops. No idea where in the world that expression might come from, but shall explore.
AI came to the rescue with these tidbits of knowledge.
“That’s the way the cookie crumbles is an idiom used to express acceptance of a situation, especially when something bad or undesirable has happened. It implies one must accept things as they are, even if they are not what wanted or hoed for. It’s similar to saying “that’s life or that’s just the way it is. The phrase suggests that difficulties or negative outcomes are often random and unavoidable and there’s not point in blaming oneself or t=others for them It’s often used in a sympathetic tome to acknowledge someone’s disappointment or misfortune. The idiom is thought to have originated in the 1950a Another way to say this: said when something unfortunate has happened that could not have been prevented and so must be accepted.”
Exploring this concept was helpful. Some of the bad news was unavoidable – no sense in blaming myself for it, or others for it. But did begin to make some adjustments to the plans, dreams, and hopes I was pursuing.
As usual, and for reasons I will never understand I kept thinking in idioms. This time, ‘canning horses in midstream.’ This is what it means: to stop using one system and start using another one, or to stop supporting one person and start supporting someone else.
My goodness that is what I have done today, in more than one way. The perfect expression had come to mind.
Then another one came to mind, describing the situation I find myself in. I have gone back to square one. “Back to square one” is a phrase that means “to go back to the beginning, after a dead-end or failure”. Where did that phrase come from? There were many board games, popular in the 19th and early 20th centuries, with numbered squares similar to Snakes & Ladders, where a player landing on a square or penalty had to go back to square one. – and this is clearly the origin of the phrase. Synonyms of square one are ground zero, day one, drawing board. first base.
What for me would be going back to ground aero day one be in light of the dead ends I have faced on this fateful day? Shamir and I laugh: it would be marrying Shamir’s father Mohan, who seems to be willing. I am laughing as I write.
Who knows, you have heard the phrase any port in a storm. This is a proverb in adverse circumstances one welcomes any source of relief or escape. Actually marrying Mohan would be a source of relief, for many reasons, not to be articulated at this time. Any port in a storm is a proverb that loosely means that when someone is in trouble one can not look for a perfect solution.
The something utterly surprising happened. . I found in my current inbox an old email from 3/13/17. How, or why it got there I will never know. It was from Jennifer Walter. I don’t recall who she is (or perhaps was). At my age people older than I are most likely dead.
“As I was reading your blog today, I was struck by the sentence “There are fine, good and inspirational people everywhere…..” and then you proceed to share your stories of the people you met in Guildford. But I don’t think it’s the “fine, good and inspirational people”- I think it’s you who brings those people out. And that’s why you find them everywhere you go! Because you’re already there! Don’t you think?”
My goodness what a discovery, made me feel good about myself. Who knows she could be right?? It was just what I needed on this day, when I seem to be changing horses in midstream yet again and always. You see, Jennifer Walter totally let me down, deserted me when I desperately needed a friend. But she did serve a useful, and rather treasured, position in my life at that particular time.
So to dismiss you altogether, to erase her from my memory, bank would perhaps be the same as throwing the baby away with the bath water.
What does this mean? One can discard something valuable along with other things that are undesirable. It is amusing in a way. It was actually a play. Summary.
This bitingly satiric black comedy, which enjoyed a long off-Broadway run, begins with Helen and John deciding their newly born child is a girl and naming it Daisy – which leads to all manner of future emotional and personality problems because Daisy is actually a boy.
Would love to see the play. i do wonder about the outcome of it all.
I readily admit that focusing upon, even dwelling upon idioms in a time of crisis is a very unusual thing to do. What I did next was equally, even not even more improbable. I was feeling utterly depressed, an usual frame of mind for me. Decided the only cure would be ice cream, conveniently located in the hotel lobby. Jumped into the elevator descending from the second floor to the first. Saw people sitting at a table, looking like they were playing cards. Went to inquire as to what they were doing. It was a tarot card reading, held weekly at Lyf. Why, is something I will never know.
Rather impulsively decided to succumb. Purchased my ice cream AND the tarot card reading for about ten dollars US. The combination served to alleviate my depression, so I guess it could be said to be money well spent. As I write I did some reaearch. I was aware that the Islamic Faith frowned upon such practices – this is what I discovered. The question. Are tarot cards haram received this answer.
“Islamic teachings emphasize reliance on Allah alone for guidance, and activities like tarot readings may conflict with this principle. Some Muslims view tarot as harmless entertainment, while others strictly avoid it, believing it could lead to shirk (associating partners with Allah).”
Also this scientific answer: Research at the University of London has found that over 55% of people found Tarot to accurately depict their life circumstances. So in that sense, the Tarot is accurate. But the question might be more about if it can predict future events.
There is no danger in associating partners with Allah and besides I had a previous tarot card reading, which had led to a valuable insight. It was performed by a cousin of mine, and contemplated and utilized in my Uncle Dave biography.
The exercise consisted of formulating three questions. One’s hands were cleaned, prior to taking the cards in one’s hands, quietly verbalizing the question and proceeding.
Me: That is interesting, reminds me of ablution before obligatory prayers.
At first it was difficult to formulate the questions. I had reached some conclusions and direction prior to the tarot card reading. Some had filled me with sadness, but the answers were inexplicable. I finally came up with the first question. I had thought of returning to California . This would allow me to get my finances in order, as my bank of twenty years is an American bank with no branches in other countries. I could also get my possessions out of storage, hire a lawyer for testamentary instruments enabling the funding of the law school education of Lenny. Shamir has a US visa and could accompany me.
The question became: “Should I return to California in order to settle my affairs.”
The answer was somewhat involved. There were positive aspects but there could be possible underlying danger, a betrayal of some sort.
My second question concerned a contemplated trip to Japan. The answer was entirely positive particularly since if it were not undertaken immediately. If I decided to mark on that journey it would be in a couple of months – during the time of my needed visa run.
The third question was slightly more difficult to put into acceptable terms but after some effort this came to mind;
How does the Israel/Iran conflict affect my proposed Umrah pilgrimage?
That answer was was more nuanced. I made notes but at this moment cannot locate them.. Nuanced is a subtle difference in or shade of meaning, expression, or sound.
In essence the answer was to look elsewhere. I am now doing so,
So many people have been so supportive of me. One individual was not, causing me pain with false accusations. But in doing so revealed his true colors. The definition: reveal one’s real character or intentions, especially when these are disreputable or dishonourable.: Simply put: to show what one is really like The idiom is more lengthy: The idea behind the phrase “When someone shows you their true colors, don’t try to repaint them” emphasizes the importance of accepting people for who they genuinely are rather than trying to change them into who you want them to be.
This all has been a lesson learned. Photographs will include a message sent by Devi, Mohan’s sister when she learned I had suffered setback. A photograph of the Tarot card interpreter. Photographs of little girls playing in the pool, which did bring me joy.
