A previous conversation with Fazil heard me saying:
Me: I will now look up jiggy and iddah. I am getting smarter by the minute with your help.
Later I did look up the two words. Jiggy was easy: it is uninhibited particularly in a sexual manner. Iddah a much more complicated matter.
Wikipedia informed: In Islam, ’iddah or iddat is the period a woman must observe after the death of her husband or after a divorce, during which she may not marry another man.[1]: 472 [2] One of its main purposes is to remove any doubt as to the paternity of a child born after the divorce or death of the prior husband.Islamic scholars consider this directive to be a balance between mourning of husband’s death and protecting the widow from criticism that she might be subjected to from remarrying too quickly after her husband’s death.[3] This is also to ascertain whether a woman is pregnant or not, since four and a half months is half the length of a normal pregnancy. m man marries a Muslim woman then divorces her before touching her then there is no iddah.
Then sent Fazil an email. Subject line: Jiggy a great word but n/a Iddah.
Me: I will add jiggy to my vocabulary, not using it inappropriately. But Iddah not applicable to me for the following reasons: I have not been recently divorced or widowed and I am not pregnant. So there is no waiting period for marriage or announcing intention of marriage. That is, unless you apply it to a marriage that got called off. I was supposed to marry in December but did not. Waiting period in that case would end at the end of March. Did I spell iddah wrong??? It happens sometimes.
He: Hahaha. I want to tell you about iddah not because it relates to you or not. But because it shows how the Quran really takes care of social integrity. We need to understand the context of pre-islamic Arabian society to appreciate this. Before Islam, there were lots of social problems relating to polyamory. People were going to bed with each other, babies not knowing who their father is. It creates a neglected society and offspring with emotional issues. Iddah is something that the Quran institutes to make sure every baby knows who their father is, to give them the privilege and right to lineage, and to give them the dignity they deserve. So that at the end of the day, we create a cohesive and dignified society. That’s all I wanted to say 🙂
Me: That is all you needed to say. That is profound! I am SO privileged and blessed that you shared this with me. Seems to me we need to get back to our Islamic roots. Same thing happening today – everybody sleeping with everybody – nobody knows what’s what. Parents take no responsibility for their kids.
He: I chanced upon this theory in a book called The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell. It’s called the Broken Windows theory. The theory goes that if a window of a building is broken, chances are, soon, there will be more windows broken in that same building. If a toilet is left dirty, after a period of time, other parts of the toilet becomes dirty. Neglect breeds more neglect. People have no respect for the place and continue neglecting it. This is my humble effort to explain it in my words haha. This relates to my story about iddah. If you recall I said that Islam goes to great length to ensure that every child has the right to lineage, to dignity, to know his parents. A proud and healthy child breeds a healthy and ethical young man. But if not, they will lead an emotionally troubled life until they become adults. And when they carry this trauma as an adult, they will inevitably pass on this trauma to their wives, their children, their friends and the larger society. This is how a society disintegrates. When people don’t care about each other anymore. When the rich look down on the poor, the parents abandon their children etc. This is the broken windows theory. No movie encapsulates this perfectly than a movie called “The Joker” by Joaquin Phoenix. If you have time, please get Shamir to get the movie and you will know what I mean. It is dark and gory, but shows where many societies, the US, in particular, is going into the abyss of darkness. The only way out is faith.
I totally, and thoroughly, agree with Fazil. Anybody with a brain would. Also totally and thoroughly agree with his solution to the abysmal state of this world, particularly the US, particularly these days. The only way out is the Islamic Faith. More about this in upcoming blogs.
For clarification looked for the definition of abyss, it is definitely not pretty.
. a deep or seemingly bottomless chasm:
• a wide or profound difference between people; a gulf: Used in a sentence: The abyss between two nations.
• the regions of hell conceived of as a bottomless pit: Satan’s dark abyss.
• (the abyss) a catastrophic situation seen as likely to occur: teetering on abyss of a total political wipeout.
The synonyms that can best describe the state of the world today, that capture the horrors, bottomless pit and void.
Our conversation continued.
Me: You are a genius and a gift from Allah. Think of the thousands of things that had to take place for me to meet you. Mind boggling. I have Netflix so maybe it has the movie. I shall look into it and, of course, ask Shamir. I am sitting by the sea. Sunrise not spectacular this morning. If they were all spectacular one would not appreciate them when they appeared in all their glory.
He: Related to your sunrise awe.
’He is the One’ Who created seven heavens, one above the other. You will never see any imperfection in the creation of the Most Compassionate. So look again, do you see any flaws? Then look again —your sight will return frustrated and weary.”
This message was sent dramatically, in Arabic with English translation. It was impossible to cut and paste it into the blog, so you only get the English words, What happened next????
More sunrises of course. One seemingly rather ordinary, the next spectacular. Sent him photos of both, so that he could look for the flaws. Hahaha
This has been too serious for some, too much gloom and doom. Do sense some humor might be needed. It has arrived. Support Grows for Trump Serving Third Term In Prison
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Support is growing for the notion of Donald J. Trump serving a third term in prison, a new poll released on Sunday indicates.The poll, conducted by the Opinion Research Institute at the University of Minnesota, reveals that many Americans would like to see Trump serve such a third term even before his second term in the White House is over. Davis Logsdon, who supervised the survey, said that poll respondents favor exploring “any way to make this happen,” including “a constitutional amendment permitting him to serve several such terms.”
I have no idea how Andy Borowitz does it. Perhaps steroids? Steroids made their appearance in a conversation between Shamir and yours truly
Me: Hey cinematographer. You need to be at the Raya the same time as me. With your cinematic abilities and my bubbly personality we will go ballistic. Or is it viral?
He: Yes cannn What time are u doing?
Me: I will ask your Dad. He says 1:30 Camera guy
He: Okay! Camera man on duty.
Me: Please salute. (Sending him a saluting GIF)
Later he sent an Eid Mubarak GIF
Me: Love this. The best ever. So looking forward to it. Camera man guy. Your Dad picking me up at 1:30
He: ok I will come around that time.
Me: Ok. I will bring my camera which is my phone.
He: Ok good idea.
Me: I am brilliant and humble.
He: You are smarter than Alexis. U are Alexis 2.0
Me: No one is smarter than Alexis. Except Alexis on steroids.
He: Hahahah
This morning at 9:02 he sent a Good Morning GIF.
Me: Good morning. Steroids injected. Or however you get them. Gonna be a steroids needed kinda day.
He: Hahahah
Looking forward to the activities of the day I did some research. I am a fast learner. Selamat Hari Raya is the greeting of today
Instead of wishing a happy new year, greet your fellow Malay-Muslim friend with “Selamat Hari Raya” which translates to “have a happy celebration.” Follow this greeting with “maaf zahir dan batin” which loosely means “forgive me for all my wrongdoings” as it’s also an auspicious day to seek forgiveness.
“What is the English translation?” you might be asking. Here is the answer.
May this special occasion bring joy, peace, and happiness to you and your loved ones. Wishing you a wonderful Hari Raya filled with love, laughter, and meaningful connections. May this Hari Raya be a time of renewal, reflection, and gratitude for all the blessings in your life.
This is being written the day after Hari Raya. There were probably about a hundred people gathered for the celebration, of all ages, sizes, and ethnic origins. Many beautifully dressed, as you shall see from the photograph. The food SO delicious, prepared with great care by Caroline, she began learning to cook at age of 14 and has been using her learning since that time. She is pictured in the group photograph, in the middle, wearing a turquoise hijab. I was promised a matching outfit so I will fit right in for 2026 Hari Raya. But as I said to a friend: “I did not get it writing.” More news and photographs of the celebration in future blogs A photo of my hair, cut and blown dry at Enyau, located in the Rainbow Paradise beach Resort. A luxurious experience. I do not cover my hair, as I do not consider it my private part. This discussed in my March 22, 2025 blog. Then a sunrise photo, one that came unbidden into me this morning, the most spectacular I had ever seen. Sent the photo to Fazil saying: “Most beautiful ever. A sign that brought comfort and peace.
